Vegmom Moments

HOW DID THAT GET THERE?

I woke up one morning to find a belly growing with a baby inside... The belly grew and grew and grew...

Then there was a labor and Delivery... You know the baby has to come out after all.....  So there was push and push and push (some more pushing)... I mean, have you ever looked at a girls private parts, they aren't normally the size of an 8 pound baby... But HELLO!  That is where God made them come out.  I guess I can't complain... By looking at the other openings on our bodies, that probably is the best one...  I mean the nose, ear and belly button, would be really bad. 

So as I was saying... The baby comes out... And then lets just say, the ligaments, bones, fat and muscle and skin that moved to get the baby out, don't always just go BOING and bounce back in to place... (Unless you have really good genes, but I'm not talking about you)

And so you have things and parts that no longer go where they should be..  Things are spread, drooped and sagged.... There are marks on things that you didn't put there, as if someone took a brown/red or Grey marker, and just said... "Ha, she's having a baby, lets write all over her belly, so when she's done it will look really really funny"  But I never saw anyone with that marker... Alas I have marks...

And then you notice flaps as if you were converting into a flying machine, but really your still just a human with new flaps that don't belong in your skin... Where did those come from, I ask myself? 

But now we must feed the baby... The new bundle of joy that turns me in to a proud happy milking machine.  I can't complain, I mean I carried those things around with me for 30 years, they mise well get their use... and so they work!  and work!  Ummmm... And they work....

After A year, I can say that I had two more giant flaps!  Yup, and each year after, I notice them getting closer to touching my belly button.  Soon I won't even need a Bra.  I'll just where a belt and it will hold my pants up and my boobs in....

And then there are sleepless nights...  Lots of those... And a few more of them...Not just the newborn kind... Oh no... It doesn't stop...  There is teething (ouch), and sick bugs (so sad), and first days of school (excitement and nervousness), and potty training (you have to catch them before they try to pee in the waste basket thinking its the toilet in the middle of the night), night waking (just to play), sleeping walking, good dreams, bad dreams, and those nights where they just don't want to sleep.  So after several years of these happening on and off, there are now droopy eyes.... Yup even the eyes are drooping...

Last night 5 years after having a child and 5 years after turning 30, I walked past a table and knocked something off... Ummm?  But I didn't touch it with my hands or my arms or my leg... How could I have possibly knocked something off of a table without touching it?  

I am clumsy after all but not that bad?? Maybe it was the wind?  Yeah, that was it, had to be the wind?  YEAH RIGHT?  What kind of wind would swoop through, while all the windows are closed and drop something on the floor.... Nope, it was me! My back side.. The part of me that seems to suck in every calorie I eat and  stores enough fat for an entire nation.. The same part that seems to be in competition with my cellulite to see which can reach my knees first.

While looking in the mirror I just have to laugh...  I mean what else is there to do???  Really... Gravity has taken its toll... And I'm thankful everyday for all my marks and flabs and everything else that brought me my wonderful little boy..... 

I'm also thankful that I don't live in outer space right now?  When gravity lets go I hate to feel the slap in the face that gets me from this bod.  Talk about something going "BOING"  It would make knocking something off the table seem like nothing.

A SURPRISE IN THE FREEZER

Hubby reached his hand in to a top shelf of the freezer last night while cleaning, and he pulled out a bag... A very solid frozen Creamy Color filled bag... Dated March 2003...

Veg says "WHAT IS THAT?"

Hubby says "It looks like Mommy's Milk Ice Cream"

Ewwwwww.... Yes it was my milk from March 2003... Wow did that bring back some memories... As were laughing and talking about Hubby's find, Veg is still asking to try the Mommy's Milk Ice Cream...

He was quite disappointed to learn that he wouldn't be eating the contents of the bag... and was full of lovely questions wondering how Mommy's Make Ice Cream like that...

<Thanks Hubby, as if I didn't already have enough questions to answer>

*smile*

EXPIRED BREASTMILK

I'm not talking about milk in a bottle, I'm talking about milk in the boobs.... I was talking to some one close to my heart yesterday and made a comment about milk still being able to be expressed even if there is no more breastfeeding going on.  "Isn't that expired milk" she said...  Indeed, the pumps have closed for the season,  The Factory dried up, Udders no more, and yet, every once in a while there is a little bit of hope from the little ladies that they will once again be put back to work. 

So this leads me to my fact or fiction of the week:

• Breastfeeding and a happy baby - most definitely FACT.. Watch what you eat, because your feeding them with everything that goes in your mouth.  A new tummy the size of a walnut isn't going to like spicy foods.  If you eat something that makes them not happy, then quit eating it - Voila Happy Baby
• Boobs grow when milk comes in - AH YES - FACT...  ummm?  the word Boulders come's to mind.  Ski Slopes, Olympic Quality Ski Slopes...
• When you quit nursing did they stay big - AH NO - FICTION...  and actually, if they used to point north, and then maybe even straight out to greet the world with big HELLO.. Well after your milk factory days are over they seem to point toward the South Pole.  In fact now they don't say hello to anything but shoes, carpet, and maybe some nice tile floor.
• Do they continue to produce milk - yes - FACT... I believe if I were to continue pumping after the fact my body wouldn't have known the difference for a while (yes my body is easily dooped).  However even with not that, there are times where I may see a little surprise of that "expired milk" just holding out for one more sip.  (the sips Don't occur- so don't be grossed out)...  There are other surprises though, like when you get out of the shower, you actually have to lift them up to dry under neath now.  If not you may find a surprise leaky faucet that just keeps dripping water all day and your not quite sure where the water is coming from.
• Breastfeeding can hurt - Yes Fact... When that first let down happens, and boobs swell up enough to feed a family of 4, that can be a little painful.  But the rest of it shouldn't hurt.  If it does then see a lactation consultant or doctor.
• Wonderful Experience - YES - FACT...Absolutely, I wouldn't have changed a single moment.    And if I were to do it again, I would without a doubt.

Stay tuned for more info on the subject, and possibly a new fact/fiction of the week to come next week.